What Now?

I have been planning to publish a new post on this blog after I graduated last March 29,2014 but its already the 14th of April and a few Holidays have past and I still haven’t. My first thought was sharing about how it felt like graduating but now… I can’t quite point out what I feel about my graduation. It felt not as special as I thought it should be. I didn’t cry nor didn’t feel like I’d never see my classmates again. There was a certain sense of finality but not the extreme finality as certain as something like death. It felt like I was simply going through the motions or maybe I was putting a brake on my emotions?

After the Graduation Program ended I felt confused, not knowing what to do first… I wanted to go and be done with the Gradation Lunch… it felt like I wanted to start something. During the Graduation Ceremony there was one thing that made me nod my head in agreement. It was the speech our beloved University President delivered. It was about being of service to others. No matter what profession we may belong after our Graduation, he was telling us to have as purpose of giving service and uplifting at least one person’s life or spirit. And truly, I plan to be more or do more of it when I pass my Board Exams this October 2014. I know I am a CPA. I’m the only one stopping myself from shining. I’m the only person who can set free my wings I try to hide because it brings lots of worries and burdens and challenges but also lots of love, faith, success, and joy.

I’m enjoying time with family, friends, and myself in this short summer break before Review starts this 26th without having to worry of Academic stuff. I’ve joined a workshop, an art competition, and plan to devour a couple of books before Review. I also plan to leave a painting representing my family before I leave for at most 6 months.

I feel something has changed with how I interact with people. I feel more genuine and sincere and I do try to focus on the things I do, moment per moment. It ain’t easy, paying attention to the here and now but I believe this helps the World alleviate or ascend to higher consciousness.

There’s so much happening within me. A part of me wants to read tons and tons of books. A part of me wants to meditate and concentrate on my breathing, another wants to start doing exercise and being faithful to the daily routine, start eating healthier, drinking healthier, sleeping earlier, painting, writing, sketching, and another just wants to lie down peacefully on a green lawned grass overlooking the city and the wind brush through my entire being, close my eyes and hear the birds chirp from a nearby tree branch, hear the soft rustling of leaves, the calm trickle of the stream, and the warmth of the setting sun on my skin, my breathing light, my muscles at peace, and when I open my eyes, I see the vastness of the sky, as the stars start shining their lights one by one.

I really think I should take a bath now. Hahaha. And maybe start a few sketches and painting! Yes! 🙂